With so many personalities in the world, you’re not going to click with or get along with everyone. The same is true with a marriage counselor. This is the person you’ve trusted to help you and your spouse get your marriage back on track, but if something seems off to either of you, it might be time to get a new therapist. The following are some things to consider.
Taking Sides
Your marriage counselor is not there to take sides. Rather, he or she should help you and your spouse learn to understand each other and communicate with each other so you can work out your own problems. If you feel the therapist has sided with your spouse, speak to the therapist about it. If things don’t change, you may ask your spouse to consider seeing a different therapist you’re both comfortable with. The same would be true if your spouse is the one who’s uncomfortable, and you should be understanding enough to try someone new.
Saying Something Inappropriate
There are going to be some uncomfortable discussions when you’re in marriage counseling. Your sex life might come up, and you may discuss it in a little more detail than you’d like. If that’s one of the problems in your marriage, it may be beneficial. If you or your spouse ever feel like your therapist has crossed the line, such as getting a thrill from hearing about your intimate life, it’s probably time to report the therapist and change to someone who can take a neutral approach to such a personal topic.
Not Providing Help
Sometimes you just don’t feel comfortable with a therapist because he or she is not helpful at all. For example, a therapist who has been counseling couples for fifty years might fall asleep while you’re talking. When he or she wakes up, it may take some time to get back on track. Another example would be a therapist who has gone through a similar situation as your own, and takes your counseling session to complain about his or her own current or ex-spouse. Neither of these situations would be helpful for you and your spouse, so you may want to see someone else.
Getting Started
As you can see, there are some issues that could come up after you’ve chosen a marriage counselor. The good news is you’re not married to the counselor. If you or your spouse are not comfortable with the therapist, try someone new until you both feel safe and comfortable with your service. Get started today by contacting a counselor, like a couples counseling from Lotus Wellness Center, and scheduling an appointment.
